How to be a good talker?

Thought I’d drop my two cents on this bc I guess I consider myself a good talker. And also I’m assuming that you want to be able to gain something from conversations after they end.

Being a “good talker”, for me, actually starts with being observant and maximizing all the information you can get from the other person. Identify who you are talking to, what the topic is about, and the overall vibe from the conversation.

It really varies on people and the situation, but for simplicity sake here are some general ideas.

  1. Always listen. Pay attention to the way they talk, the words they use. Adjectives are something to look out for because they increase the magnitude of situations for better or for worse. Pinpoint key ideas and phrases that they say or have opinions of and identify what are yours.
  2. If you don’t know or understand, ask to elaborate until you understand. Worst thing that can happen is you freezing up because you don’t understand a concept. The more someone elaborates for you, the more information you can absorb to formulate your own conclusion and “poke holes” or “slip your way out” of things.
  3. Try and remain as calm as possible. Having a level head is absolute key to getting things the way you want. Arguing and shouting and being vocal with your ideas will make them seem more irrelevant bc you have to rely on other means to get your point across, and often times it can cloud your judgement. People are emotional beings, and a person having a good day will be a hell of a lot nicer and more generous than one on a bad day. But don’t get me wrong by just being monotone all the time. Feel free to use a more articulate tone and project your voice when necessary, once you have some logical foundation.

All in all just listen, break things down to the core variables for you to understand, and piece them back together to either throw back at whoever you’re talking to, or to build up the conversation, or to get your way with things.

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